Wednesday, June 18, 2008


This past weekend we all know was Father's Day. I had planned on taking the Mr. out to eat and to a movie, no hot kitchen. Well, as we have experienced a lot of times thing don't quite work out as we plan. I got the hot kitchen.

The day before he invited his 87 yr. old father over for dinner while we were visiting and of course I didn't say a word. Yes, I did, I asked the old man what he wanted for dinner. It was a special day for him and he spent the whole day with us.

My stepdaughter called and wanted to be picked up, okay another guess but more help in the kitchen. My step has been having some life crisis' so her Dad decides she needs to talk to me.

Her problem, the same as most making decisions and a plan and sticking to them, not secon guessing herself. Who knows better than you what is good or bad for you. No one. What's so hard about sticking to a plan, nothing much if you write it down ..... a lot if you don't.When there is nothing to see, you don't have anything to gauge.

I asked her what it was she wanted out of life and what it is she wants to do. I asked if she had a plan. Of course not. First things first, let's start by thinking what it is we want, then how are we going to get there. She looked at me somewhat confused, I think she expected me to give her the answers. The problem with this is, I don't know what she wants, only she can answer those questions.

I suggested getting a notebook, regular cheap spiral, I keep boxes of them here at home, I have children. "Now, you need a pencil or pen," prefer pencils with erasers, good for mistakes, don't you sometimes wish you could erase some of the mistakes you've made in life. Of course you do but you can't. Don't look at them as mistakes, look at them as learning experiences, for that is what they are.

Now to wait and see what she comes up with. It's okay to bounce your thoughts off of other's, seek your own strengths for yourself and ask for input, make it clear it is only input, don't give up your control. You might be surprised to find that there are others that can see more in you sometimes than you can see in yourself.

Decide what it is you want and then set about making a plan to acheive it. Look at it as a road map for life. When you go somewhere for the first time, you get directions, you write them down and you're off. See the beginning and the end. The in between is your guide on what it is you need to do to get to where you want to BE.

You have to be able to make hard but good decisions to accomplish your goals. Knowing when to say 'Yes' or 'No' are going to be two most important words you will learn and use. Remember this is about you and your future. Don't allow poor judgement to choke your dreams. Make a decision and stick to it, don't question it. Try it, it might or might not work but you'll never know until you try. Do a little each day, don't over whelm yourself, that can be a quick ruin. Take it slow but steady and as I said before, for each baby step you make it puts you closer to where you want to be. With each step do something if no more than the happy dance, like dancing in the end - zone after a touchdown, it's fun or call someone who cares and share your steps with them.

Whatever it takes to keep you pressing forward. Remember we learn from our mistakes so don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't fall right into place easily, nothing in life is easy. It is easier to give up than to try again and spend the rest of your life wondering what if.

As always feel free to leave your thoughts or comments. Communicate.
I love hearing from you,